I am really not having a good time with banks at the moment.  If, like me, you do your personal banking faithfully with Halifax, you are probably about to be stiffed for a large sum of cash.  Halifax have decided that their existing charging structure is not right.  I expect they are pooing themselves because the whole charging system is going through the courts and should reach resolution by Christmas, hence their decision to change everything on 6th December this year.

They have decided that, instead of charging £35 per transaction made over your overdraft and a £28 fee which they refused to explain to me (they can no longer call it an “admin fee” due to legal limits on what can reasonably be charged for admin, particularly with an automated process where no admin is involved!!) they will instead be charging £1 per day that you are within your authorised overdraft and £5 per day for when you go over.  This means, that for someone who dips £10 into their overdraft for a day, they will be charged the equivalent of a 3,650% annual interest rate. Great!

Now I fully believe in taking responsibility for your actions.  I strongly agree that I should be charged if I go over my overdraft, but I think that the charges are not representative.  Surely there should be a sliding scale.  Electron cards can and will (in most cases?) be stopped if you go to a till and there are insufficient funds available.  Halifax will not implement this sytem for their cards.  As a result, I was almost charged, recently, £98 for going £4.20 over my overdraft in two transactions.  This is ludicrous and will not help me get out of debt.  If I had spent £300 in one transaction I would have been charged £63.  Do you see what I mean?  There should be a daily charge, or a sliding scale (£5 for going over by up to £10, £10 for up to £50 etc).

The thing that makes me angry about the new system is the lack of responsibility the banks are showing.  They have given us two months (at Christmas) to get out of our overdrafts.  An overdraft is simply supposed to be a buffer.  It is not something you are supposed to permanently exist within.  However the banks have actively and positively encouraged us to constantly extend our overdrafts beyond our means (as with credit limits).  The more debt you are in, the better your credit rating appears.  This makes no sense whatsoever and is irresponsible.  Whilst we should all take responsibility for our spending, it does not help when the salespeople that are bankers dangle the carrot.

I have a suggestion.  if your overdraft is out of control, the bank should say that they are going to reduce it by £100 per month, until it is a reasonable buffer rather than an extended credit agreement.  This is a much more realistic sum to expect people to pay back.  What if someone has a £2,500 overdraft (because believe it or not some banks offer it!)  and has 2 months to pay it back?  It is madness!  I am so glad that the rule doesn’t apply to the student account, as there would be a lot of students who have just left uni with massive debts (not a huge amount of jobs out there) who will really be up the creek!

We have started a postcard wall at work.  Whoever you might be, reading this, do send us a postcard:

Studio 14, Berkeley Mews, Cheltenham, Glos. GL50 1DY.

So I send back an email saying “Unfortuately 3 falls directly between 2 and 4pm, when I am out of the office.”  I get a reply….

“Naomi, I will see you tomorrow at 2pm at your office”.

My reply,

“I don’t think you are reading my emails properly.  I am not in the office between 2 and 4pm.  I can do 9am, 4:30pm, 1pm, even 6pm but not between 2 and 4!!”

This guy looks after our money.  ARRGGHHHHH!!!

So today I get an email from the BM….

“Hi Naomi,

Is it possible to get together this coming Friday to review exactly what has been received to date on the two new accounts for Jellify and Pink Sky please?

I know most of what you have received to date will probably be destroyed but I can show you what is ‘in the pipeline’ too.

I am away Wednesday / Thursday due to the School half-term break but am hoping Friday is convenient for you. Please let me know.”

I reply that I am out on Friday but could do tomorrow ANY TIME APART FROM BETWEEN 2-4PM.

His reply:

“Hi Naomi,

I can do 3pm – do you want me to come to you so I can see your Office /
Studio etc?”

Er……

So the £500 was mysteriously ‘found’.  I logged in to all of my accounts to see if it could have been paid into one of my other accounts (I didn’t see how it could have been as I paid in using my chip and pin card so it could only be associated with that one account!)  It wasn’t there.  I phoned Natwest and was told “Nah.  We have no record of that” and then he more or less hung up on me, as if I was just supposed to say “Oh well, no worries!”

So I went to the branch where I had paid it in and the lady recognised me.  After two members of staff looked at my accounts and also verified that it was not there, they promised to look into it and get back to me.  I told them I was off to the other branch to see my business manager to see if I could speed up the process as our office rent was due.

Business manager was not too thrilled to see me.  He said “hmm…. Let me take a copy of your receipt and see if we can resolve it.  I really don’t understand why you haven’t just gone to the branch you actually paid it in at”.  “I have.  I was there for an hour and they couldn’t do anything”.  By this point I felt like throwing him out the window.  He came back a minute later and said “Found it.  You paid it in to your savings account” (as if to say “you stupid plank”).  “Er….  One of the reasons I am dealing with you, is because a savings account was never opened for me under this particular iteration of “Pink Sky”, even though it should have been!!!  He visibly bristled.

He logged in to my new Pink Sky account (different card, different login etc so no way it could have gone there by mistake) and showed me £500 that had “gone in” two days previously.  “SEE?” he said.  “Not really” I replied.  “Not only did I check that account, but so did your other branch and it wasn’t there 5 minutes ago.  Not to mention the ludicrous fact that IT SHOULD NOT HAVE GONE IN THERE!!!!”

He turned to me with a smarmy smile and said “Hey look on the bright side.  You’ve probably earned 1p of interest whilst it has been there!”  I nearly exploded.  “Yeah, because that really makes up for the 2 HOURS OF WORK THAT I HAVE MISSED talking to you” I said.  At which point he attempted some vague level of professionalism.

I asked him why he’d claimed to have emailed me about the wrong cheque books and paying in books and debit cards.  He said that he had, of course, but I do not have those emails.  He just said “Over the next few days you are going to be bombarded with paper”.  Oh fantastic, just what I was after, following such a catastophic portfolio of errors!!  It was as if he was expecting me to thank him for it!!!  Funnily enough, I have not been bomarded, in fact I have not even received a fluttering of paper.  Not a sausage.  And our postman has been delivering.  So, I await tomorrow’s phonecall (to arrange a get together) and am not sure quite how long I can be ‘Christian’ for!!!  It is definitely a challenge of grace and patience. I don’t know how Jesus does it!

I barely dare open my post these days.  For those of you who are not akin to the absolute saga that is Natwest business banking, here is a very brief outline.

I had one account (elevation) which has been happily in existence for two years.  All I wanted to do, was open two further accounts, which could be linked to elevation on one online profile, to save the use of three customer IDs, three activation codes, three 4 digit pins, three passwords, three card readers, three additional cards etc.  Should not be difficult…. Should it??

So here goes.  I receive a debit card to “Sky Pink” (business name is Pink Sky).  I had a half hour argument with the bloke on the phone about getting a new one because he insisted that “Pink Sky” didn’t fit on the card, despite the fact that it would be exactly the same as the one in my hand, only the other way around.  It finally transpired that he was trying to write “Naomi Turner Trading As Pink Sky”.  I reminded him that “Trading As” is usually written “T/A” to save space.  “Oh yeah” he said.  I felt like asking how many of these he did each day.  The card arrived with “Naomi Turner Pink Sky” on it.  No T/A.  Never mind.  What didn’t arrive, was the pin number.  I was unable to withdraw cash without ID….. For three months.

I did not have online access to the accounts for three months.

My business manager took two months to return my call (after calling four different people to get hold of her and them moving her to Tewkesbury without telling me and having her take a two week holiday without leaving a replacement manager in her place).  She took a further two weeks (twice) to return other calls and then failed to sort out the problems.

I was told when opening the accounts that I could easily link all three together online (the main reason for opening the accounts).  I then found out that I couldn’t.  I was missing two cards to go in card readers, so couldn’t juggle money between any of the accounts.  I also couldn’t make payments to people and had to withdraw cash (with ID) or write cheques.

I was supposed to have a reserve account for each of my accounts (to put money in for tax etc).  No account was opened for Pink Sky.

I applied for a credit card for elevation and never got it.

There is no business name on my card reader cards so I have no idea which corresponds to which account.

The Pink Sky credit card was not activated.  Neither was I instructed to activate it.

After three months of no pin number I wrote a three page catalogue of complaints to the bank manager.  She called me to apologise and said she was ordering a number straight away.  Ten days later I called to see where it was and the staff member “couldn’t be sure if it had been ordered or not” (what?!) So she ordered another one “just in case”.  I nearly exploded.  If a bank manager can’t even order a pin number, why do they look after all our cash?!

So I go to see my new business manager, who is reportedly “excellent”.  Actually, I was not impressed.  Every time I got vaguely irritated he tried to make a joke about it with phrases such as “Woooaaahhhh steady on, don’t get all funny with me!”  When Mark (who I took with me because when I get stressed my IBS kicks off and I panic) tried to speak on my behalf, he held up a sheet of paper between my head and Mark’s and said “don’t you influence her, this is between me and Naomi”.  I got cross at this point, saying I was entitled to consult my business partner for advice and that although I don’t suffer from a “permanent disability” that would be listed in his catalogue, I do suffer from a stress-related illness which is set off by things like this (well, and general digestion but never mind).

He promised to sort it all and, after applying a little pressure, was persuaded to give us £90 as a goodwill gesture.  He opened new accounts under elevation in the names of Pink Sky and Jellify. In the meeting he managed to contradict himself three times (it became clear that he didn’t know how to use his online system), order me a card which we eventually established that I didn’t need and treat ME like an idiot.

In the last week I have received two paying in books, in the name of “elevation”, with the account numbers of Pink Sky and jellify.  I have received a debit card for Pink Sky and one for “Business Account”.  No idea what that is for then.

We called him and he claimed to have emailed me to say that some stuff had gone wrong.  Not only should there be no excuse on earth for it going wrong AGAIN, but he didn’t email me at all.  He is going to pop in on Monday.  Only six days too late.

To top it all off, I paid in £500 on Monday and they have lost it.  I phoned the online bank and they said there is no record of it.  So I am just supposed to hang up?!  And do what?  I have to go to the branch apparently and present a receipt that has no account number on it.  How much more lost work time am I supposed to endure, just to run a bank account???  There are a few times in my life that I feel like swearing or kicking something.  Now is one of them.

Game over Twatwest.  I am off to another bank.  But are there any good ones at all??  Please help.

Something I thought I would NEVER say…..

Outside our office is a council-owned private road with double yellow lines.  Therefore the traffic wardens cannot ticket us for parking there.  A certain business which shall remain nameless, got fed up with the unit residents parking for free when they hire one of the four paid spaces, so they decided to ask the council to employ clampers.

I was really annoyed.  What was the point?? Why didn’t they just scrap the double yellows and make 6-10 spaces so everyone gets one with their office??  It was only office staff who parked there anyway.  Also, we are not allowed to rent the two vacant spaces even temporarily because they belong to a vacant unit.  Ridiculous.  Why can’t we use them until it gets rented?

However, I have to say that the clampers are really good sports!  I am here on a Sunday catching up for lost work due to a virus/cold type effort which has really knocked me out this week.  They just knocked on the door and said “That’s your Toyota isn’t it?” (in one of the 4 paid spaces that are not used at the weekend, let alone the two that are never used).  “Yes” I replied, wincing. “How long do you reckon you’ll be here?” “Oh, only a few minutes more”.  “No worries then.  If you’re ever popping in for an hour at the weekend, just give us a ring, it’s no problem”.  I was so taken aback all I could do was smile and say thank you.  At last!  Some people who see sense and exercise a little grace.

http://pinkskydesign.com
Enjoy!

Pink Sky Design going live today!!  Will keep you posted….

I have just found a group on Facebook that left me appalled.  It is called “Scrap the free bus passes for pensioners”.  It has 832 members who are blethering on about why the tax payer should pay for OAPs to travel one stop on a bus.  They have even submitted a petition to Downing Street!!!  I really hope that Downing Street laugh in the face of it.  THEY ARE OAPs!!!!  They can’t walk very well you selfish b******ds!!

Here’s an idea.  How about banning chavs who get pregnant at 16 (and predominantly use the busses to transport their 5 kids to and from Wilkos) from getting ‘free’ (or seriously reduced) houses because they claim that they cannot possibly work because of the cost of childcare??  And it is these same people who are claiming that despite their free houses and free benefits, that they shouldn’t have to pay for bus fares!!!  I am enraged.

If you are on jobseeker’s allowance, you have to produce evidence every week of which jobs you are applying for in order to get your cash.  If you are a single mum aged 17 with 2 kids, you just get given the money.  If, like me, you don’t want to live off jobseeker’s allowance or an incapacity benefit and so start your own business, budgeting carefully and having to eat Lidl 19p supernoodles (without the flavour sachet because it makes you ill) for lunch, you get naff all in the way of help.  I am not complaining about my situation, I believe it to be a privileged one.  What I am complaining about is 832 idiots, who resent the elderly.  These are people who have brought us up and been through a lot of things for our sake.

Why is it that we can be so pig-headed that when they get to an age where they need a little of our help for a change, we have to make a fuss over it?  After following an old man round the inner ring the other day (he was driving a red rover metro) at 8mph (no joke), I watched with horror as we approached a red light and remember thinking to myself “I reckon he hasn’t seen that”.  Sure enough he sailed straight through it at 8mph and I beeped my horn frantically making flashing light motions with my hand.  He didn’t even hear my horn, he carried on staring straight ahead.  Mercifully he didn’t get hit, but I would MUCH rather pay for him to be on a bus than on the road!!